Dear diatribe....

And now! I answer your silly comments! (without which, truthfully, I'd be lost):

THE DEW (aka Lynne) sez:

Well, Lynne *might* have rejoiced more if you'd thrown her a PASSING "Happy Birthday," but she's TRYING to be gracious and rejoice in CK's nonexistence nevertheless. She's got a big heart.

Ooooh my bad big time! You see, I think because I was on the IM with you at midnight (EST) and then you went to open your presents, it kind of slipped my mind the next day. And it was my total bad and I hope you had a glorious 28th birthday!

And then Stewy said (he's a real talker, but I like that):

I wouldn't go so far as to call it a "tsk" ... just a niggling concern for your mortal coil, what with the icy road of death and all.I empathize with your homes on the Bowl Games. Every time I tried to sit and watch, I had to get up and go somewhere after half an hour, so there was no satisfaction. The one game I did get to see was a total damn blowout, so nothing there either. The only game that would have made me a happy Stew, I didn't get to see at all. I would have liked to watch Navy win their game... It's been years since they were ranked at the end of the season, so huzzah to them.

I actually got to watch most of the Rose Bowl which....AWESOME! A very evenly balanced game with a good back-and-forth to it. I had to go out shopping at a certain point in the third quarter. I found myself perusing the DVDs dangerously close to the TV display where they were showing the game. When I realized that I was only watching the game with all the bored husbands and not shopping, I figured it was time to checkout and get to the bar. I got to the bar when there was one minute left. And it was one damn exciting minute. Very good game through and through. Also a good excuse to start drinking at 7:30.

Kobe is just a stupid symptom of the stupid NBA. I wish great success to the handful of players that aren't just looking to promote their rapper careers, or trying to be badasses, but both of those guys aren't enough reasons to watch basketball. Give me the college game anyday. At least only some of the college players are overpaid thug whiners.

I'm sorry, I don't mean to brag (again), but my Mavs are just so well-behaved. None of them have a rapping "career", none are thugs, they stay out of trouble and act like gentlemen in public. I like to think that Mark Cuban had a lot to do with that. He knows how to treat his "employees" and they like that and would prefer to keep their jobs, so they behave. They're just a classy crew. Even when we signed known "troublemakers" in the league, they behaved themselves while they were here. I can totally understand the ire you feel towards the NBA, but they're not all jerkfaces. The ones who get all the attention usually are, though. College ball...I don't pay a lick of attention to college ball until March Madness. And then I fill out one of those thingies with all the forks for a bunch of teams that I know nothing about. Last year, the entire top left-hand side was marked out in red for all the wrongness that went on. But it was fun anyway!

Yes, the Wrath of the Stew is fierce indeed. I make Khan look like he's back swilling mai-tais on the island with Nick Nack. Ha! Even I almost believed that.

KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!! I can get you a shirt with that on it. Totally.

OK, anyway. Did you guys see The Amazing Race??? OF COURSE YOU DID! I cannot wait until Jonathan and Victoria get le boot. I mean, yes he is abusive and I feel positively awful for her (I would say she just needs to leave him, but it is never that easy). But at this point? They're kinda ruining the race for the rest of us. I mean, if they leave, then I can get on with hating Freddy and Kendra (breeding? BREEDING? Ugh.) in a more healthy manner. But they keep ending up in 2nd and 3rd which...yuck. Somebody yield their sorry asses. Oh, and how about Lori and Bolo coming from dead last place to getting the Fast Forward and finishing WAY in first place! I was scared that a team I liked would get the boot! And then...a team I really liked got the boot. How come the good keeps coming in last and evil keeps finishing 2nd or 3rd?

Hm, ooooooh and LOST! It's back! And tasty! So what is up with that toy airplane? I read somewhere that it is not only very significant, but also has connections to Jack! Sorry, spoiler there, don't highlight it if you don't want to know! I'm sorry, I read tvguide.com a lot and they don't give spoilers, they give out TEASERS! And the teasers for this week's episode were very misleading! I like 'em that way... Keeps me guessin! Oh and how about Sayid and Shannon!! Sparks? Maybe? I did not see that one coming, which is probably why I like it!

And 24!!! Returns this Sunday!!! January 9th!!!! OMG I can't wait. It's going to be sooooooo gooooooooood! OK I'm done gushing about TV..... for now.....