An open letter to the 10th season of Survivor

First, I'd like to give Jeff Probst the biggest sigh of disgust and utter disapproval for referring to Angie and Steph's battle during the reward challenge as a "cat fight." That is sexist and disgusting and shame on any man who uses that phrase unless two actual cats are fighting.

Angie, I hate your bra. Please. Put those things away. Thank you.

Jeff, it makes me sad when you wear a shirt. Please stop.

Ibrehem, how can you only be a waiter? No worries. You'll be a model right after this show is over because you are very very pretty. And also... no more shirts for you. Thanks.

Kim, the only useful thing you've done on this show is call Bobby Jon "Tarzan." That was awesome. Now shut up and get to work.

Coby, oh my God put some clothes on. You are from Texas, I want to like you, but if you and Angie weren't on different teams, I would swear that you guys were sharing underwear. *shudder*

Tom, you are hot. You are 13 years older than me and totally out of my age range and we probably have nothing in common and you're totally married with three kids and a golden retriever, but that doesn't make you any less hot. (From his picture, he may not look particularly good looking but if you watch the show, you will see how in control and totally hot he is).

Stephenie, you are also hot. I have no lesbian leanings whatsoever, but holy shit you are awesome. Not only do you hang with the guys on the physical challenges, you often beat the crap out of them. I am frightened and in awe all at the same time. I am sorry you are on the crappy tribe.

Bobby Jon? Hot.

James, when you said that "Kim is a woman and all she's got going for her is her sek-shiality" did you mean that all women only have their "sek-shiality" going for them? Or just Kim? I mean, I know that some women overuse their sek-shiality to get what they want and don't bother developing other social skills, but if you think that all women are like that? I want to kick your ass in the most major way.

Ian, you are amazing and adorable. You may not be the prettiest, but you are so totally the coolest. I would make out with you way more than I want to make out with anyone else. Even Stephenie. Hm, from reading your bio, I see that you are actually quite interesting. I also see that you are single. Call me!

Everyone else is either a total blur or I have not yet formed an opinion.

Love,

~ Di