Ten Things I've Learned This Weekend

1. Wal-Mart + Saturday afternoon = Suck
2. People will actually make out in the shampoo aisle right in front of me.
3. Cinnamon Altoids ROCK! Seriously.
4. I have a new friend.
5. His name is Patrick.
6. He thinks I'm a nutcase.
7. He does not understand the beauty of the llama.
8. It inexplicably takes two hours to drive from Lewisville to North Richland Hills and back to Lewisville while driving 80 miles per hour the whole way, even though it's "only" a 50 mile round trip.
9. If you ask me for directions to a restaurant, I will be compelled to give you a main route, two alternate routes, reasons you may want to take the alternate routes, and my full assessment of the restaurant including the thickness of the chips and the zestiness of the salsa. Hey, you asked for it. You knew what you were getting into.
10. I can ignore you no matter how hot and Australian you are.