If you don't watch Last Comic Standing, you won't really care about this post

First let me preface (ooh look a preface before anything else!) this by saying that I am typing as I watch Last Comic Standing, so sorry if it's disconnected and random.  Well, OK, it's always disconnected and random, but this time I have an excuse. 

Can I just say, I love John Heffron?  He is so adorable and, the hottest of all, he's FUNNY!  Was that a ring I saw on his left hand!?!  He can't be married!  It says nothing about being married in any of his bios!!!  Maybe it's just decoration.  Not that he needs any.  I mean, I've had unhealthy crushes before, but at least this time I know he posesses the sexiest asset of all:  he's a total spaz.  So if you are so inclined to vote, please vote for my boyfriend!  He has a code on his site to put a button on my blog, but I can't get it to work and I can't understand!!!  Gr!  I still love him, though.  Sigh.

Corey Holcomb:  He didn't even make me chuckle and his stage presence is well....not present.

Bonnie McFarland:  New haircut.  Same bad attitude.  Ha!  "Nice to meet you!  Give it a minute."  OK that was funny.  I still won't vote for her.  I think I've already decided who I'm voting for. 

Jay London:  The guy never did anything for me.  A lot of one-liners.  I wonder if he ever looks normal.  I mean, I know this isn't a beauty pageant, but his looks distract me.  I'm just sayin. He's no John Heffron.

Ant:  Sorry, he was OK until he started stirring up drama in the house.  Everything was FINE until he started in with the dramatics and typical reality-show scheming.  He also does too many gay jokes.  Atkins and crystal meth diet.  HA!  That was funny.  He should stick to VH1 commentaries, though.

Todd Glass:  See?  He said it himself!  He lost fair and square!  But he's still the funniest of these five.  So here's my endorsement for tonight.  Vote Todd Glass.  1-866-FUNNY-95.  What am I saying?  It won't matter anyway because they're all going to lose to JOHN HEFFRON in the end anyway.