Maybe Clay Aiken can sing the Pink Panther theme and it can all come together

As with most mysteries, I think Jessica's theory on TOIL is only partially right. She came over on Tuesday to watch the Amazing Race with me (which was Amazing indeed. Colin is soooooooo slimy!).

So while I was cooking ( I felt so domesticated! Felt kinda good.), I'm filling her in on what happened Sunday after she left. Apart from me hitting "Proud Mary" outta the ballpark, I mentioned that Brad kinda laid into me in a not so respectful way. He thinks I'm taking it "all" out on him. I'm like, dude, that is totally in your head. How come I'm only taking it out on you? How come no one else seems to have a problem with me having a problem with Captain Kangaroo? Why is it JUST YOU? Ugh. He does not want to listen. I think he only wants to create drama. And when I sense that, I am OUT! I'm done. So I just said, "I'm sorry if it seemed like I was being a bitch to you. It was not my intent." And with that, I had my keys and I was gone. Wha. Tever.

Wow, that was off subject. So anyway, then she commented on what I had written before about all of her theories and once again, I told her she was totally nutso for thinking that TOIL actually likes me. Because, just....there's no way. He has had plenty of opportunity. Then, just as in those Agatha Christie books that I love to read, I realized that I had overlooked a small detail that very well may be the solution. Jessica suggested that maybe he knew about my silly little crush (yes, that's what I'm calling it!). I said, no way. Who knows up there? Wanna know who knows? A BUNCH OF DRUNK PEOPLE! It is very possible, now that I think about it, that someone may have slipped. The Chief. He is always asking what I need. He is the sweetest man ever. I truly believe that if there was something I needed, he would find a way to make it happen. But he's like my uncle, so don't even think about going there. So anyway, when he asks me what I need, I usually say "that right there" and point at TOIL. So The Chief knows of my love. I wonder if he slipped without even knowing it. And if he did it knowingly, he was trying to help. I'm sort of OK with that because I know he's doing it out of love, but at the same time, I really want TOIL to come to adore me on his own terms....should he decide to or something.

Hm, I was perusing my old blog posts to see if I ever wrote about how I came to love TOIL. I don't think I did write about it, but I found this post which kind of amused me and gives some insight to the newbies who are all "what the hell is a TOIL?" Hee! So anyway, what happened was WAAAAAAAAAAAY back in March during that one big basketball tournament. Texas was still in it. I really have a hard time caring about college sports unless it's my college or Texas. So I was up there by myself watching the game. It was too crowded at the bar, so I was at a little table that's half booth, half chairs, right? Right. So he gets a break and comes and sits down next to me on the booth side. He says he's on a break and lays his head on my shoulder. (!!!!!) We chit chat about the game and how we both love Texas and blah blah blah. And then he says, "I haven't been on a date in so long. Seems like I'm always working." Now smart me, the hindsight-is-20-20 me would have said, "Oh, you should try lunch dates. Do you ever work during the day?" (He runs his own business when he's not bartending, just FYI). This would have naturally progressed into "Want to have lunch Tuesday?" or somesuch. But NO! Stupid me had to go and be all "Oh, but we love it when you're here! You bring all the beautiful people in" or some lameass attempt at a compliment. Oh ha ha you funny stupid girl! But what I was thinking at that moment was "How could this guy have trouble getting a date?" Mind you, this was before I realized I loved him. So he got up and went back to work. And it puzzled me that he would say such a thing to me. And then it puzzled me that I was puzzled at all about it. And then, just like that part in Clueless where Cher figures it all out, the fountain lit up and I realized. I love TOIL. And now it has been SIX MONTHS! And three girlfriends. Hm. So this one is scheduled to be doomed abooooooooout....gets out calculator.....Halloween? But she's a waitress there? I hope if they break up, he doesn't feel like he can't come in there any more. I hope he gets the bar in the divorce. Apparently, he was a regular there before he started working there. OK, I'm thinking way too much about something that is never going to happen. Those guys hang out all the time and I am there 2 nights a week, tops. He makes me laugh and no man will ever match up to him in my mind, so basically I'm screwed and not in a good way. Pathetic!

I'm outie!